Self-care, whining, and backstage wisdom

The good news - or bad, depending on your perspective - is that I feel much better today.

Aside from feeling a bit silly and exposed for my public pout, I have awakened to a newfound appreciation for the fact that letting people know how I feel isn't a bad thing. Putting a brave face on is, actually, dishonest if one can't stop even when feeling rotten. I'm embarrassed at one level that showing my weaknesses brought on such kind warm and generous responses - but deeply grateful as well. I encourage my kids to "be real" and to accept help when needed and of course this is the nature of friendship as well. Yes, the Internet and this odd real/virtual life of "Laura Collins" are not the same as working at an office but then again sharing an office means knowing when your friends and co-workers are in bad moods and knowing when to drag someone off for a latte.

There is a lot more I could say, mostly iterations of the words "THANK YOU," but I will let something that happened last weekend illustrate my morning revelation.

I had my yearly tap dance recital on Sunday. It's a small town and a big dance school and the recital concert is for everyone from the 4-year olds in tutus to the 70-year old Snappy Tappers. Hundreds of my fellow citizens were out there in the dark. Backstage I was, as usual, assuaging my nerves by insisting I just like to dance and have no interest in performing and wish I didn't have to "do this."

My classmate, who has been very patient with me, looked me in the eye and stated the obvious:

"Laura, it is a 'performance' art."


  1. Glad to hear you've got your groove back. Any chance of a photo of you in a tutu?

  2. How I wish I could have seen the "Snappy Tappers"!

    It is reassuring to know that you, too, Laura are human! We all have our bad days, and we shouldn't have to always appear calm and strong. Pouting can be very therapeutic occasionally.

    I am dying to know what kind of costume you had to wear for your recital. I am envisioning a top hat, tails, red-white-blue, a cane?

  3. Not a chance. Ladies of a certain age get to wear nice black pants and a crisp white shirt, thank you!

    I'd post a pic but my classmates might not like the notoriety.


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